Showing posts with label time management. Show all posts
Showing posts with label time management. Show all posts

Monday, April 30, 2012

A Day in the Life of a Writer

With Sanctuary for a Lady having been released for about a month now, I keep fielding questions and hearing comments about what being a big, famous, published author must be like. So I thought I'd give you all a glimpse of my glamorous author's life.

1. It's not glamorous.
2. I'm not famous.
3. I'm not big. In fact I barely  reach 5'1.

I still scrub my own toilets and clean up my dog's vomit. I still play with my kids and help pick up their messes. And book contracts or not, I'm still interrupted from my computer activities. For example, since I've started writing this particular blog post, I think stepped away from the computer to tend to the kids four times. (Heaven forbid my husband who is currently sprawled across the couch get up and find spoons so my boys can eat some yogurt.)

While I might be able to endure distractions during writing a blog post, I can't handle distractions while writing scenes for my novel. So to find distraction-free writing time, I get up at 5:00 am to write. Then I get the kids around for the day, do housework, play, fix breakfast, lunch and sometimes dinner (my husband helps cook dinner certain days), and clean it all up.

On top of that, I try to sneak time for a second writing session while my youngest is taking his nap. Then I have emails to answer, blog posts to write, blog interviews to fill out, Facebook and GoodReads to swing by and chat on, and books to package, address and take to the post office.

I usually fall into bed around 8:00pm each night, completely exhausted. But I still take about an hour to read, so that I get some sort of break from the crazy, constant, motion of my life.

Would I trade my life? No. I love writing, I enjoy staying in contact with my writing friends and readers, I long to be a good mom to my children and wonderful wife to my husband. But these obligations keeps me very busy, working 14 hours most days.

Which is why I've decided to write only two blog posts per week rather than three. I enjoy each of you readers and look forward to connecting with you through my blog. The topics of mothering and balancing our other obligations are very dear to my heart, and this blog provides an opportunity for me to express that. But at the same time, as I look down the long road of blogging and realize that I'll be doing this for years to come (along with writing novels), three posts a week seems too much for me. Two posts appears a lot more sustainable over the next few years. And so I'll be switching to a Monday and Thursday blog schedule. Thank you all for understanding.

So, now that you know a little about my life, what's involved in being an author and mother, I'm curious about yours. Do you find yourself juggling multiple responsibilities? Are you the type to add too much to your plate, or not enough? How do you decide when to pull back or keep going?

Thanks so much for joining me today, and I'll be back again on Thursday.

Naomi

Friday, April 13, 2012

The Myth of Free Time

In the fall, all four of my children will be in school, albeit not all full-time (my youngest will be in a three-day preschool program). Whenever this comes up in conversation, the enviable response is, “What will you do with all of your free time?”

Ah, free time—that mythical land to which every mother longs to go. As someone who currently works part-time from home, I rarely have free time now, and I don’t anticipate that changing once the children are in school.

I think the bigger question is what does this say about the current view of mothering. My mother stayed at home, but her time wasn’t consumed by doing for—or entertaining—me. Sure, household chores ate up some time, but once we were older than three, time spent in childcare dropped considerably for women of my mother’s generation.

That kind of mothering has fallen out of favor, and with it the rise of no time, free or otherwise. I am grateful for my mother’s example, for it gives me the fortitude to follow in her footsteps. Direct care of my children has lessened as they age; correspondingly, time I spend taking care of the household has also dropped as the children have picked up more of the cleaning chores.

In turn, that has allowed me to pick up some of the things that I put on hold when the children first arrived: reading, writing, knitting and sewing, for example.

While I’m looking forward to a quieter house next fall, I won’t have to worry about how to fill my suddenly “free time” since my time has always been mine to fill. I’ll take the 24 hours given to us each day and try to use it wisely—just like I do now.

Sarah Hamaker is a freelance writer and editor, and author of Hired@Home, a guide to unlocking women’s work-from-home potential now available on Kindle. Her stories have appeared in previous Chicken Soup for the Soul books. Sarah lives in Virginia with her husband and four children. Visit her online at www.sarahhamaker.com, where she blogs about working from home.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Tips for Packing with a Family


It's travel time again. And gone are the days when you blissfully threw your clothes into a suitcase and left it in your room for your dad to get and take to the car. YOU are now the parent in charge of not only getting the luggage to the car, but packing that luggage as well. Besides just the clothes, shoes and socks, all of which your two year old may well drag out of the suitcase three minutes after you've put everything in, you also need to pack the diapers, road snacks, road toys (can anyone say portable DVD player?), port-a-crib, and the list goes on, and on, and on. So let me give you a few tips for getting on the road.

1. Clean your house early. Nobody wants to come home from being gone two weeks and walk into a house that looks like it just survived a nuclear holocaust. At the same time, cleaning your house and packing can be a little overwhelming (and impossible). So try cleaning your house earlier in the week, before the crazy packing starts. If you have the floors swept and vacuumed and the bathroom scrubbed, you can do a quick pick-up an hour or two before you walk out the door and know that everything is pretty clean. Not that your house won't have a stray toy littering the floor or a few books stacked on the stairway, but you won't return home to chaos and filth.

2. Take your clothes from the laundry basket and put them straight in the suitcase. The week before leaving, try letting some of the laundry sit until a couple days before you head out. Then do the laundry, drag those suitcases out of the closet, and put the clean clothes straight in the suitcases. Then you won't be folding clothes and putting them away one day only to drag them out the next day and refold them so they fit into your suitcase a little better. This is one of those rare cases where putting off laundry will actually save you time. :)

3. If you'll have use of a washer and dryer, only pack five outfits. Five. Yes, I know it's hard to limit yourself, especially if you have little boys with penchants for getting dirty often. But since I can do laundry every few days, I don't need to take more than five. Plus it's hard enough to make sure those five outfits get back into the suitcase for the return trip. Why add more?

So there you have it. Three tips for packing with your little ones. We'll revisit this topic again on Friday because, well, the more I think about it, the more I realize how many more packing and traveling tips I have. So until then, happy packing!

A special thanks to Melissa Jagears for filling in for the blog on Monday, when I was traveling 600 miles with two little boys. To read her post on living frugally, click here. Or you can visit her blog, where she has a ton of cool frugal tips.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Take a Break: and Survey the Cross


Hello all you wonderful blog readers. How's your week been? Mine's been a bit crazy, as we're getting ready to leave for a two week trip. No, not to the Bahamas (sad, I know, I since we've had three winter storm warnings in six days). My mom's having pretty serious surgery on Monday, so we're going for a little visit. With all the packing and writing and cleaning I've been doing, I needed a little break. So I hopped on over to YouTube and found the most beautiful hymn. Enjoy.

What about you? When you get so busy you can hardly stand up straight, how do you de-stress?

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The 4-Hour Workweek Review


Hmmmmm. My husband really wanted me to read this book, and I think it is the kind of topic that lots of working mothers would be interested in. Obviously the title made it sound too good to be true and you know what that means...

Pros:
  • The guy is inspiring, even if you don't agree with his philosophy of life, he'll make you reexamine your situation. If you're unhappy with your life rut, he might help you see your way out.
  • It's a book of ideas.
    • If you've ever wanted to start an online company, he'll give you some things to think about to keep you from simply losing money and choosing the right company idea for you. 
    • If you think you want to work from home or become self-employed in order to be with your family more, he'll help you realize that you could get stuck at home working for work sake and still not spend time with your family, and he'll give you practical ideas to keep that from happening. 
    • If you've ever wished to travel the world or climb a mountain but always think "It'll never happen until I'm too old to do so" then this will inspire you and give you some ideas on how you can accomplish these things before you are too old.
    • If you are always pressed for time, if your to-do list never gets shorter, if you work all day and get nothing done, then he'll jab at you until you see what you've been doing wrong.
  • There are tons of website links to check out, and I dog-eared a few that I think I really ought to look into right now, some I'll look into later.
  • He challenges the emptiness of the materialistic American Dream and the Workaholics
Cons:
  • The author's ethics are a little shady. Though I found it funny that he knows and often provides a less shady option. For example, while he's trying to work productively, if someone comes in and interrupts to chat, he'll say, "I got a call in five minutes that I have to take, but go ahead and let me hear what you need" in order to streamline the conversation though he has no call waiting in truth. But he give you a non-white-lie option--it just takes more guts to be truthful, he says! Yes, yes it does, but it's worth it.
  • Did I mention it's too good to be true? Well, it is. As I was reading, the whole time I'm thinking--ok, so you say everyone can sell stuff online and do no work by hiring others to do it for you, but where do the "others" come from? Obviously not everyone can do this or no one would have food to eat, etc.
  • Following all the author's advice could lead to people not liking you--which is okay if you're okay with people not liking you. Some of the advice was freeing like: Choose the charities you want to work for and give to and don't listen to anyone who tells you that your charity isn't as good as their charity--work for your values and be content. But some advice like--I got A's in college by badgering the professors for an hour whenever I got a B to make sure they thought long and hard about giving me anything less than an A again--just makes him a jerk.

LOL moment: The author says something to the effect of: "I wanted to write a top-selling book, so I researched how to do it, took it to the right agent, and sold it--there you go, piece of cake." While that sentence right there made me know this guy wasn't the authority on everything, he certainly did do it. How? By catering to the masses' desires and utilizing his platform and expertise--quite smart, yes, but the hubris made me laugh all the same. He advocates life work that makes you happy, and becoming one of those quack doctors that sells alcoholic mixtures that "cure" everything and prey on people's desire to find a miracle most likely didn't bring those traveling quacks peace and happiness--and it probably won't bring you happiness either--unless you're Mr. Ferriss :) But you can't fault the guy for knowing how to market himself--and there are tips for that if you need to market yourself and your product/services in the book.

I can't say this book is a must-buy, nor am I saying it's worthless. I'm keeping my copy, the website links and some of the information I think I'll find useful, but I would advise ahead of time to "Chew up the meat and spit out the bones"--find what might help/inspire you, but ignore the get-quick-rich dream and shake your head at the young man's arrogance.

What I am glad I read this book for (basically the first half of the book):
  • I had already started to declutter my life from time-sappers, this book inspired me to do more, challenged me on the things I was still keeping around that sucked my time, gave me some practical advice on what to do with those things and made me realize that I am in charge, I can't blame my busyness on anyone but myself, so what was I going to do about it?
  • I loved the analogy that the opposite of being happy with what you are doing in life vocationally isn't sadness, but boredom. He asked his readers to think, "When you awake in the morning, what things would make you super excited to wake up knowing you were about to do or knowing you possessed?" He didn't use "happy," which is nebulous. According to his exercises, I really thought about what would make me excited to wake up everyday and I surprised myself at some of the things I wanted. Some were simple things I should add to my life to make me happy that I have no reason not to be working toward right now.
  • I loved the inspiration to really examine the fact that for the majority of people possessing things won't make you excited (no matter what advertisers say), it's what you're learning or doing for others that gets people excited and that should be your goal rather than the entrapment of materialism.
  • He encourages you to make an action plan for your dreams. My hubby and I sat and talked about our dreams, picked out our top 4, and as the author said, they aren't as expensive as you think if you plan ahead of time for it instead of saying, "Some day...." Some of our dreams didn't even cost a thing, but without them defined and given an action plan, they stay in the realm of "some day."
I'd advise people who are
  • looking about how to set up an internet store
  • soon-to-be retirees who want to know what they are going to do with all their down time
  • entrepreneurs who are drowning in busy work
  • people unhappy with life because they hate their jobs
  • and people who would like to travel or do a lot of short term mission trips
to take a look at the book for some inspiration and practical tips. Just don't get caught up believing being filthy rich on 4 hours of work a week will make you happy or is even plausible.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Juggling Multiple Jobs

Photo Credit Here

In addition to being a mother and a writer, I also maintain a full-time job outside of the home. By the time my commute is factored in, I spend approximately eleven hours a day away from my house…away from the mountain of work that awaits me even during my “down time.”

A typical day for me looks like this:

6:00am—Get up, get myself ready for work and my daughter ready for school

7:00am (hopefully!)—Leave the house

8:30am-5:00pm—Work

5:00pm-6:30pm—Pick up daughter from daycare, arrive home

6:30pm-6:45pm—Beg my husband to let us have take out ;o)

7:00pm-10:30pm—Writing, playing with daughter, housework, spending time with husband

10:30pm—Getting everyone ready for bed

I know you’re probably wondering why I felt it necessary to list out my entire schedule…it’s because I want to demonstrate that as mothers, whether we work outside the home or not, our lives are busy…jam-packed. You could probably fill the 8:30-5 gap with a thousand necessary things that you do at home.

So here are my tips for juggling several jobs without doing disservice to them all:

· Utilize To-Do Lists.

Desirea did a fabulous post here about the subject. Without my lists (and I have a separate notebook for what needs to be done around the house, at work, and with my writing), I’d be lost!

· Learn what can wait.

Not everything has to be done right this minute. Figuring out what I can procrastinate on helps free up time for something more pressing.

· Try to set boundaries for your business time.

In theory, I’m much better at this than in actual practice. But I firmly believe having a set schedule for when you do your work from home (or house work, etc.) helps keep things under control. Setting these boundaries also allows you to consciously spend more time with your family, relaxing, etc., outside of your “work” hours.

· Learn that sometimes it’s okay not to work.

Sometimes I think I must be the worst mother in the world! I let the stress of my day job and of my writing career convince me that I have to go 90 to nothing in order to get it all done. I stay up late, get up early, burning the candle at both ends to get something finished. Unfortunately, sometimes, I’ve done this to the exclusion of my family. So my biggest challenge is letting the workaholic in me take the day off. This gives me the opportunity the chance to focus on my two more important jobs: being a wife and mother.

How about you? What helps keep you sane when you’re trying to juggle a thousand things at once?

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Striking a balance

Sometimes, I give myself permission to be slack.

My life is crazy, hectic, wonderfully full. In addition to working a full-time job (with an hour-long commute each way), I write from home, wrangling my Regency-era characters into finding their happily-ever-afters. And then there’s my family, my husband and my three-year-old daughter. Add to this the usual demands of the home…laundry, dusting, vacuuming, scrubbing toilets, etc. (I would add cooking to that list, but I’m blessed that my hubby takes care of that for me!)

Regardless of whether we work from home, or outside of the home, or both, we all have obligations—ones that can quickly become overwhelming depending on what’s going on in our lives. I usually find that as soon as I tackle the never-ending mountain of laundry, something crazy happens and I might let it pile up for a day or so…then I’m back where I started.

In the past, I’d really let that kind of stuff get me down. I’d start thinking about how I must be the worst wife and mother in the world because it had been too long since I’d dusted the baseboards in the house. Once the guilt started piling on, I’d morph into SuperMom mode.

As SuperMom, my mantra was that I was going to get everything done even if it killed me.

It never did kill me, but those moments of single-minded determination did hurt me in other ways.

In an effort to clean the hampers out or reorganize the pantry, I would stress myself out and deny myself the things that truly make me happy—spending time with my family, reading, relaxing, etc.

I don’t pretend to know what works for every mom, but I just wanted to share how I keep myself from going crazy. A little secret that’s not really so much a secret.

I stop beating myself up. I decide to watch Beauty and the Beast for the 50th time with my daughter instead of doing some menial chore that could wait an hour or two. I hide in my bedroom and read a book. Instead of stressing out when my husband and daughter make a wreck of the kitchen while they try to bake muffins, I laugh. And I’m reminded how rejuvenating it is to relax.

Because somewhere, in the quest to be a domestic diva, I forgot the importance of my home being a haven and a place of rest…and not just another set of items on my to-do list.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Write-More Tips for Busy Moms!

Since Ethan arrived in 2009, my long days of writing are over. Unless he's out at the park with Athos on a weekend, and even then, I've got to pick up clothes off the floor, wash diapers, clean the streaks he made off the glass, buy bananas, pick up toys... and so on.






If you're a writer without children and reading this, ENJOY YOUR TIME! Write all you can, because it might end soon.

If you've got a two-year-old like I do, or maybe more than one or two kids, you've got to be extra-creative because they won't just lie on a blanket anymore and play with toys while you happily type away. As we say in the South, "that dog won't hunt!"

Here are some tips that have helped take me through three full-length novels (100,000+ word count each) in ONE YEAR:

1. Shower at night. Then when he sleeps during the day, you can use your time to write rather than dry your hair.

2. Peg at least half of his naptime for writing. Fix it in your mind or write it in an agenda. I don't set an actual time count, because I never know exactly how long Ethan's going to sleep. But I estimate and try to write at least half the time he sleeps. That means about one hour per day, since he only sleeps around two hours. In fact, most of the time I spend Ethan's *entire* naptime writing and clean when he wakes - while he helps me!

3. Write early in the morning. I find my creative juices flow better if I start writing before he wakes up (I know, it's hard... Ethan sometimes wakes up at 5:30 or 6:00 a.m., and we are TIRED!). But the reason for early writing is two-fold: 1) Your mind is less cluttered from stuff ("Don't put the shoe in the toilet!") and 2) you can continue to plot and think of story details, even lines, while you do your daily work. More often than not I find my lines fixing themselves, or the breakthrough I need in plot, while I'm changing diapers or standing over a pot of spaghetti. (Just preferably not at the same time).

4. A side note: This also works for Bible readings, too! I like to read and pray quickly in the early morning, if I can get up before Ethan wakes up, or if not, as soon as he takes his morning nap. Then write. Then you can have both of them flowing in your veins the rest of the day. Or until he drops a basting brush down inside his bed, and you forget everything else. (This actually happened).

5. Try to stay up and write at least 30 minutes before you go to bed. My mind is pretty much shot at this point, but the more I sit there, there are still a few ideas that sneak into my brain. Athos and I like to end weekdays by sitting on the sofa together, he with his international politics book and me with my laptop. If nothing else, reading over what I've written during the day, or brainstorming for titles (this is how all my titles "Southern Fried Sushi" happened, in a beat-up spiral notebook). Just a little focus can get a few last gasps out of your tired brain.

6. Write something - anything! Even if you can't write the novel you're currently working on, write something. Journal. Write down a recipe. Do some writing exercises from a writing craft book like "The Art of War," an absolute wonder book. Create lists of suitable names and last names for characters, or a bank to choose from - like "Mennonite names" and "Redneck names," both real examples open in my laptop right now. See? You're already thinking it: So what if there was a redneck Mennonite? What would he be called? Would he wear suspenders? What if he was out plowing his field, looking for love and his lost heifer, and...

7. If you're too tired to write, and I understand this (Ethan's first year was EXHAUSTING), then read. Read books in your genre, or a genre you'd like to write, and then think/write about what you liked and didn't like. What you could use in your own books, like a well-developed character, a verb tense, a style, a... something. Or read a good craft book like "The Art of War."

8. Don't get distracted by email. Try to write with the Internet OFF or you'll probably just morph over into Facebook and forget what on earth you were trying to work on, and did she write back yet? Do you think she's read your post? And what was the name of that actress on...? (Are you believing me yet?)

9. Snatch bits and pieces of time to write - while your child is in the bath, while you're in the car riding to the in-laws' house, or sitting in the empty conference room waiting for your students to arrive before you teach a class. WRITE! Open your laptop, reach for your writing notebook, or grab a sheet of paper and start putting down paragraphs or ideas. No place for a laptop? Then brainstorm titles on a piece of paper (all the titles for my "Southern Fried Sushi" books came this way), or plot out your next book chapter by chapter. Write ABOUT your book as if explaining it to someone else, and watch the unsolved twists suddenly straighten themselves out. And if you've got no pen or paper, THINK through the plots while staring out the car window or stirring that spaghetti. You'll be surprised how much you can invent/create/fix just by focusing your thoughts on what you're writing (or want to write)!


10. Incorporate a "down time" into your kids' afternoon or morning - in addition to his nap. Ethan sleeps late in the morning, so I've built a one-hour rest time into his afternoon schedule - rest for him, and rest for me! He doesn't sleep, but he plays his crib or bed quietly with toys while the microwave timer goes for one hour. (Older kids could just stay quietly in their rooms). We worked with this gradually from little up using the "blanket time" method, starting with five minutes, with some gentle reinforcement and rewards for obeying. Now he actually looks forward to his quiet time and is cranky if he doesn't get it. And what do I do while he's playing quietly with tractors? Go in my room, shut the door, and WRITE!

Happy writing!


Jennifer Rogers Spinola is an ESL teacher and author of Barbour Books' "Southern Fried Sushi" series - her first book released this October! Jenny lives in Brasilia, Brazil, with her husband and two-year-old son, Ethan, and has a sore throat, a mess in the kitchen, and burned sausages in the fridge. Today's net writing time? An astounding three hours. See more of Jenny's crazy life at http://www.jenniferrogersspinola.com/ and click on BLOG!

Monday, April 25, 2011

~ So Much 'To Do' Lists... by Desirea Packard ~

I was not always an organizational person by nature. In fact, if you asked my twin, who I shared a room with until we went to college, she would totally agree. I became more organized after I got married and had children. I guess because it wasn't just about me anymore, there were other people who depended on me. Now that I am a more organized person, I make lists. I have several lists, some are covering my desk, some I have lost and then I have to make another list and try to remember what was on the one I lost. Not always the best way to go about it. But it is what it is.





I make a list of things that I would like to accomplish by the end of the week. If I make it for one day, I find myself getting bogged down on what I didn't get finished, so I plan for a week. Of course with that being said, I always find myself adding to it daily. For example, one of the lists I make is not really a list, but a meal plan. Once a month, I sit down and make a list of what's for dinner. This is time consuming, but also very helpful because this way, half of my grocery list is made for the week because I all ready have a list of meals planned. Plus this way, I am not playing the "what's for dinner?" game. I am not perfect at this, it's something that I work hard at because it's much easier. I make a list for things pertaining to my photography work, like editing photos or following up with a client, or ordering prints. I make a list for household things that need to be done like cleaning the bathroom (because I HATE doing it) or dusting. Even though these are things I should do without a list, it's hard for me to do them because cleaning house is not my favorite thing to do. If I am lucky enough, I can call my mom and she does it for me. Lame I know, but a true story. The point is, lists can be very helpful in your everyday life, whether it's for work, your children, your family or your meals, they are a resource in helping you accomplish your goals for the day, week or even months. But remember don't get aggravated with the things you don't get done, just keep working and check off the things that you have done. It's quite rewarding that way especially if you are not having that great of a day as you would like, seeing the things you did accomplish marked off always makes me feel better. I could never manage working at home and keeping the home separate without them!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

A Sleep Solution

by Sally Chambers

Glimpses and Guidance from the Garrett

Have you just been reminded by that women's magazine on the table that says you need to get your "beauty sleep?" and you know there's no way that's happening? Are you exhausted from conquering cobwebs, creating casseroles, chasing children, and the million other things you have to do every day?

I remember the times when I was exactly that, exhausted and complaining to my mother that 24/7 just wasn't enough. Wise woman that she was, she handed down some sage advice.

"Take naps when your children do."

No, I'm not encouraging you to sleep less, but I am discouraging you from worrying about when you sleep.

It's said that Ben Franklin only slept two to five hours a night, but he caught up on his lost sleep with cat-naps during the day.

Call it a power nap, siesta, or a kid-nap, it adds up to a smoother day. When I followed my mom's suggestion, I had much more energy, my "off-with-their-heads" mood vanished, and even though there was still dust in the corners, I don't think a soul noticed but me.

When you lie down, you will not be afraid; yes you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet. Proverbs 3:24 NKJV

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Finding Time to Work from Home

by Naomi Rawlings

The baby is asleep, the older children happily playing. You sit down at the computer or sewing machine or office desk to sneak in a few moments of work--you know, the kind of work you get paid for. The kind that doesn't include dishes or laundry or cleaning. Within five minutes, chaos breaks loose.

It happens to every mom that works at home. Let's look at a few ways to sneak some time.

Try getting up early. You probably take advantage of nap time and bed time. Have you considered finding some early morning time? After my youngest was born, I found myself too tired to get anything done at night. I now get up at 5:30am to write. Does it sound crazy? Please know that I started at 6:30 and worked my way back an hour. The early morning time works great for me. I get a start on my day and am often halfway through my writing goal by the time the kids wake. Be warned though, 5:30am is not for everyone.

Hire a babysitter, or use a daycare once a week. Yes, the point of working at home is that you are home--meaning available for your children. However, you might both benefit from a break once a week. Do some figuring. Is the amount of work you'd get done in three hours worth the cost of childcare?

Have your husband babysit. My husband and I have a tentative arrangement. Once a week, he takes the kids for a few hours while I pack up the laptop and go somewhere to write. The arrangement isn't engraved in stone, but most weeks it works out. It also gives daddy some time to focus on the kids.

Arrange play dates. Have you tried coordinating play dates? See if you can set up a time where your kids go play once a week and a corresponding time when you host the play date. Parents of both families benefit from some alone time, and the children benefit from the social interaction. Getting on a weekly or biweekly schedule can work well. It seems as though my four-year-old wants a friend over twice a week, so I keep that in mind and try to arrange for my eldest to be gone during my baby's nap time.

Good old TV. I occasionally rent a dollar movie. I don't use this every day or even every week. But if I need to get work done and I have both kids, I shove a dollar movie into the DVD player while I put my baby down for nap. Try not to overuse TV. Your child probably watches some TV every day. If TV is always a babysitter, your child may become so used to it that it looses it's appeal. Renting a movie can give TV time a special feel and keep your child glued to the screen.