Sometimes, the solution to a parenting problem can be as
easy as looking at the problem from a different angle. As parents, we often get
hung up on enforcing a solution that causes angst to both child and parent when
there might be a better way of accomplishing the same thing. Here’s a personal
example:
Every time I passed the hall bathroom, which served both our
guests and our children, a hand towel would be on the floor. This drove me
crazy with a capital C. The kids—being only in the beginning of the civilizing
process—would simply yank the towel off to dry hands and then toss it in the
direction of the towel rack.
The two youngest children simply couldn’t reach the towel
rack, so I told them to put the towel on the sink and I would come by later and
re-hang it. No amount of correction made a lasting change. It seemed that I was
destined to lose this battle, one that was increasingly grating on my nerves.
Then I had an epiphany while looking at the kitchen towel
hanging so neatly on the fridge handle: What if I made the hall bath hand
towels the same way? An hour or so of sewing transformed the hand towels.
Now, the towels hang nice and neat on the towel rack, and my
blood pressure doesn’t rise every time I walk by the bathroom. The children can
reach the towels and, after nearly a year of use, have yet to yank the rack off
the wall by pulling too roughly on the hanging towels.
Best of all, it was a solution that solved a problem in a
unique way. (Please note that I’m not recommending this approach for behavior
problems.)
However, for those occasional problems that come our way as
parents—such as hanging up coats after school (consider bins for the coats,
mittens and hats) or keeping library books in one place (perhaps a basket for
each child’s books that’s stationed near the front door)—thinking of a solution
that makes it easier for the child to comply with your request might just be
the ticket to a little less stress in your house.
What are some ways you have solved a similar problem?
Sarah Hamaker is now a certified Leadership Parenting Coach
through the John Rosemond Leadership Parenting Coaching Institute. She’s also a
freelance writer and editor, and author of Hired@Home,
a guide to unlocking women’s work-from-home potential now available on Kindle.
Her stories have appeared in Chicken Soup
for the Soul books. Sarah lives in Virginia
with her husband and four children. Visit her online at www.sarahhamaker.com.
